While all of this is beautifully expressed,. I think alignment is the key to achieving what you write about.
I know for myself, I used to practice a course in miracles, which is very similar to what you write about, until I had an NDE and realized it was splitting me apart. Prior to the NDE, something in me kept telling me something was off and then (after the NDE) I realized it was cognitive dissonance/spiritual bypassing. I realized the only way out of the "off" feeling was to understand alignment. For example, if you truly believe in no hierarchies you won't participate in hierarchies, serve false masters, support polluters etc, or buy from companies who use slave labor or abuse power over others. Why would you? Simply because they aren't real? What this brought up for me was: If they aren't real, why do it at all, why not choose different? The answer: fear. Fear of what? Giving up lifestyle. Giving up what is out of alignment. I then went deeper and deeper under the fears, realizing how dominant they are in our lives and how conditioned we are to never question anything, to never think outside the box, and never even know these fears are there. Then I realized compassion. I wasn't ready to give up those fears, and that was okay but it was important not to split myself or be in denial, because that lead to cognitive dissonance. So, for me, there came the realization of a split between lifestyle, action, and spiritual awareness. And also the difference between knowing something in my mind, in my heart, and in my being.
Maybe this was the reason why the masters, monastics, mystics, and mendicants lived a simple life and lived how they did. I imagine they wanted to live in alignment because the alternative is cognitive dissonance. Maybe they knew more than we do now. Not sure... hope I make sense. This has triggered me to ponder old questions I once asked, but it seems timely for me, so thank you for this.
Thank you for sharing this so honestly, Mandy. What you’re describing makes a lot of sense, especially the way cognitive dissonance can arise when what we know, how we live, and what we fear aren’t yet in the same place.
When I speak about “nothing left to align,” I’m not pointing to bypassing action or compassion, but to the moment when alignment is no longer used as a measuring stick for worth or awakening. Before that, alignment can be deeply necessary—especially when the body and nervous system are still negotiating fear, lifestyle, and survival.
What you named so clearly is the danger of splitting ourselves in two: holding an ideal in the mind while the rest of us isn’t ready to live it yet. That split hurts. Compassion, as you said, is what allows integration instead of denial.
For me, alignment naturally expresses itself once fear loosens—not as a rule to follow, but as a movement that no longer feels forced. And when it’s not there yet, honesty matters more than performance.
I really appreciate the depth and care in your reflection. It adds something important to this conversation. Thank you.
While all of this is beautifully expressed,. I think alignment is the key to achieving what you write about.
I know for myself, I used to practice a course in miracles, which is very similar to what you write about, until I had an NDE and realized it was splitting me apart. Prior to the NDE, something in me kept telling me something was off and then (after the NDE) I realized it was cognitive dissonance/spiritual bypassing. I realized the only way out of the "off" feeling was to understand alignment. For example, if you truly believe in no hierarchies you won't participate in hierarchies, serve false masters, support polluters etc, or buy from companies who use slave labor or abuse power over others. Why would you? Simply because they aren't real? What this brought up for me was: If they aren't real, why do it at all, why not choose different? The answer: fear. Fear of what? Giving up lifestyle. Giving up what is out of alignment. I then went deeper and deeper under the fears, realizing how dominant they are in our lives and how conditioned we are to never question anything, to never think outside the box, and never even know these fears are there. Then I realized compassion. I wasn't ready to give up those fears, and that was okay but it was important not to split myself or be in denial, because that lead to cognitive dissonance. So, for me, there came the realization of a split between lifestyle, action, and spiritual awareness. And also the difference between knowing something in my mind, in my heart, and in my being.
Maybe this was the reason why the masters, monastics, mystics, and mendicants lived a simple life and lived how they did. I imagine they wanted to live in alignment because the alternative is cognitive dissonance. Maybe they knew more than we do now. Not sure... hope I make sense. This has triggered me to ponder old questions I once asked, but it seems timely for me, so thank you for this.
Thank you for sharing this so honestly, Mandy. What you’re describing makes a lot of sense, especially the way cognitive dissonance can arise when what we know, how we live, and what we fear aren’t yet in the same place.
When I speak about “nothing left to align,” I’m not pointing to bypassing action or compassion, but to the moment when alignment is no longer used as a measuring stick for worth or awakening. Before that, alignment can be deeply necessary—especially when the body and nervous system are still negotiating fear, lifestyle, and survival.
What you named so clearly is the danger of splitting ourselves in two: holding an ideal in the mind while the rest of us isn’t ready to live it yet. That split hurts. Compassion, as you said, is what allows integration instead of denial.
For me, alignment naturally expresses itself once fear loosens—not as a rule to follow, but as a movement that no longer feels forced. And when it’s not there yet, honesty matters more than performance.
I really appreciate the depth and care in your reflection. It adds something important to this conversation. Thank you.